i, too, have been unusually excited about christmas this year! for some reason, tho i'm not as externally festive as i've been in the past - fewer decorations, less holiday paraphernalia - i am feeling more anticipation than usual. maybe it's because i missed out on a lot of "christmas" last year while i was in portland, but this christmas feels new to me. certainly, a big factor is that this will be the first christmas eve that curtis will be home when the girls are getting ready for bed and opening their teaser christmas eve gift. i have always done this myself, and then usually sat alone for an hour or more waiting for him to be done work, just shrugging it off as "the way it is". but knowing that he will be here, and we will all be together, increases my joy exponentially. i am feeling warm and fuzzy, just sitting here thinking about it. a pastor's family shouldn't have to miss out on the best moments for christmas - it just makes you hate christmas a little bit. and year by year it becomes less special and less wondrous... but not this year. this year christmas eve has been transformed from a work night into a real night of peace on earth and joy to my world.
because the things that make it holy are not just the babe in the straw, a star and shepherds, but the present and real Jesus, weaving in a dance amid my daughters laughter and curtis' and my love for each other, and God's joy witnessing all of it. the baby doesn't make a difference if he didn't grow to be a man, and the man changes nothing if he didn't sacrifice his life for us, and his sacrifice is meaningless unless he really was resurrected - only the present and real, resurrected Jesus gives the baby of the manger the power to change everything.
oh, holy night....
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
tuesday morning adventures! OR "why curtis is a better human being than me"
the necessary preface to this little story is two-fold. a) i am not a morning person - understatement of the year! and b) i got 4 non-consecutive hours of sleep last night.
curtis left to take kyra to school around 7:15. at 7:17 my phone rings and he has a flat. luckily he's still in the neighborhood, so will i come get kyra so he can put on his spare? my head pounding, i throw on a hat and some jeans, and race to the truck with meg... and while pulling out of the garage hit the bushes and scrape the entire side of the truck. clearly i should not drive whilst still asleep. i find kyra, race her to school (jury's out on whether she made it to class before the tardy bell, but there was hope!), and get another call from curtis saying that his tire iron broke, and i need to pick him up and bring him home to get his tools. so meg and i go get him, he gets his tools (including a hammer?!) and take him back to his car, where we wait to make sure nothing else goes awry. all is well, and meg and i return home to finish getting her ready for school.
why is it that, at the end of all this, i am left feeling like mine was the lousy morning? i wasn't the one who got up early - curtis was, and does everyday with kyra! i wasn't the one whose car got a flat. so i had to get up 10 min before my alarm went off - big deal! curtis, when i picked him up to get his tools, still had a smile on his face! i was faced this morning with how selfish i am - like screwtape's letter to wormwood, i think i "own" my time, am entitled to it, when i neither create it, nor can i add to it! (c.s. lewis - 'the screwtape letters')
so a shout out to curtis! a great husband & father, and a man who didn't lose his victory on a crazy morning! you go, big boy! i love you... and even tho you are lucky to have me, i am lucky to have you, too! ;)
curtis left to take kyra to school around 7:15. at 7:17 my phone rings and he has a flat. luckily he's still in the neighborhood, so will i come get kyra so he can put on his spare? my head pounding, i throw on a hat and some jeans, and race to the truck with meg... and while pulling out of the garage hit the bushes and scrape the entire side of the truck. clearly i should not drive whilst still asleep. i find kyra, race her to school (jury's out on whether she made it to class before the tardy bell, but there was hope!), and get another call from curtis saying that his tire iron broke, and i need to pick him up and bring him home to get his tools. so meg and i go get him, he gets his tools (including a hammer?!) and take him back to his car, where we wait to make sure nothing else goes awry. all is well, and meg and i return home to finish getting her ready for school.
why is it that, at the end of all this, i am left feeling like mine was the lousy morning? i wasn't the one who got up early - curtis was, and does everyday with kyra! i wasn't the one whose car got a flat. so i had to get up 10 min before my alarm went off - big deal! curtis, when i picked him up to get his tools, still had a smile on his face! i was faced this morning with how selfish i am - like screwtape's letter to wormwood, i think i "own" my time, am entitled to it, when i neither create it, nor can i add to it! (c.s. lewis - 'the screwtape letters')
so a shout out to curtis! a great husband & father, and a man who didn't lose his victory on a crazy morning! you go, big boy! i love you... and even tho you are lucky to have me, i am lucky to have you, too! ;)
Monday, December 15, 2008
monday updates....
more gratitude!
my class was canceled and i went to coffee with a friend instead! hooray!
then i saw a yellow bellied sap sucker on my bird feeder! they are rare around here, so hooray!
thanks, God!
my class was canceled and i went to coffee with a friend instead! hooray!
then i saw a yellow bellied sap sucker on my bird feeder! they are rare around here, so hooray!
thanks, God!
attitude of gratitude
monday morning - the last week of school. *ahhhhhh*
i wouldn't tell my kids, but i don't like school either! i don't like the tired rush of the morning, the endless lunches, the mountainous middle school homework.... i can't wait for christmas break!
here's what makes this monday morning a 'good' morning. let's start with the most important thing. coffee. God bless, retroactively, the aztecs or myans or whomever it was that saw this green bean and though, "hmmm. lets put it in the fire, grind it up and soak it in water. i bet it's miraculous!" also, it's already 56 F outside, headed to 68 F! woot! in our former hometown, the temp this morning is -18 F, but with the windchill it feels like -34 F! (and people wonder why i don't long to move back home!?!?) also, i am going to the gym and have a fun class this morning with some great women who make me happy - it makes the gym managable on a monday morning. i was given flowers last week by a family friend, and they are still blooming and beautiful. and my husband told me yesterday that he loves my cat because he loves me. awww!
really, i have a lot to be thankful for. and it's a good way to start the week, remembering.
i wouldn't tell my kids, but i don't like school either! i don't like the tired rush of the morning, the endless lunches, the mountainous middle school homework.... i can't wait for christmas break!
here's what makes this monday morning a 'good' morning. let's start with the most important thing. coffee. God bless, retroactively, the aztecs or myans or whomever it was that saw this green bean and though, "hmmm. lets put it in the fire, grind it up and soak it in water. i bet it's miraculous!" also, it's already 56 F outside, headed to 68 F! woot! in our former hometown, the temp this morning is -18 F, but with the windchill it feels like -34 F! (and people wonder why i don't long to move back home!?!?) also, i am going to the gym and have a fun class this morning with some great women who make me happy - it makes the gym managable on a monday morning. i was given flowers last week by a family friend, and they are still blooming and beautiful. and my husband told me yesterday that he loves my cat because he loves me. awww!
really, i have a lot to be thankful for. and it's a good way to start the week, remembering.
Saturday, December 13, 2008
anticipation
well, we are only 12 days from christmas. my girls started opening their 12 days of christmas gifts my mom helped them choose out for each other, and in the midst of the whooping, curtis rolled over in bed and looked at me with one eye open and said, "the christmas delight is here." i had to laugh!
the next 12 days are the best days of the year... the anticipation, the pie, the little gifts and christmas tree lights... i love them. there is nothing more exciting than what could be.
i hope i have time to enjoy the anticipation for the next week and a half... i hope you do! i hope for us all a few quiet nights with people we love, lit by tea lights and christmas trees. i hope for us all festive drinks in "high-heeled" glasses, cosy fireplaces, and the anticipation not only of the gifts that are wrapped and taped under the tree, but the anticipation of Who will be...
the next 12 days are the best days of the year... the anticipation, the pie, the little gifts and christmas tree lights... i love them. there is nothing more exciting than what could be.
i hope i have time to enjoy the anticipation for the next week and a half... i hope you do! i hope for us all a few quiet nights with people we love, lit by tea lights and christmas trees. i hope for us all festive drinks in "high-heeled" glasses, cosy fireplaces, and the anticipation not only of the gifts that are wrapped and taped under the tree, but the anticipation of Who will be...
Friday, December 12, 2008
13 sleeps
only 13 sleeps til christmas!
my very favorite part of christmas is christmas eve, after The Girls go to bed, and i load up the tree and fill the stockings. it's the coolest thing about being The Mom. i sit on the floor, infront of the tree, and can't keep from grinning. though the trinkets and baubles underneath it are rarely expensive or spectacular, they are always opened with insane joy and wonder. but for me, christmas eve, late late, my joy is in the anticipation... it's in being the giver of that joy. i love it. i love to sit in the dim quiet and play in my minds eye the giddiness of the morning. it's hard to go to bed - the excitement of christmas morning is almost more than i can bear.
what's your favorite?
my very favorite part of christmas is christmas eve, after The Girls go to bed, and i load up the tree and fill the stockings. it's the coolest thing about being The Mom. i sit on the floor, infront of the tree, and can't keep from grinning. though the trinkets and baubles underneath it are rarely expensive or spectacular, they are always opened with insane joy and wonder. but for me, christmas eve, late late, my joy is in the anticipation... it's in being the giver of that joy. i love it. i love to sit in the dim quiet and play in my minds eye the giddiness of the morning. it's hard to go to bed - the excitement of christmas morning is almost more than i can bear.
what's your favorite?
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